Last night I had a dream (Or 'I fully acknowledge how lame this is')

In that dream Mel got engaged.
In that dream I was gutted.
When I woke up I was gutted.

It's weird, you spend two years trying to move on to get over someone. They then get back in contact and you remember all the reasons why you fell in love with them in the first place. Yes, I said that. You then try and ignore said feelings. You then have an honest conversation and realise they don't feel the same way. You then try and move on, do the friends thing.

The problem is, its hard to try and think a certain way when your heart really just doesn't want to.

You then have dreams, in those dreams you have the conversations you wish you could have and everything is perfect.

I know how stupidly childish, schoolboy, dumb ugh this sounds, but in all honesty, for the sake of my sanity, I need to move on. If you could possibly pray about it (much as I kinda sorta don't really want you too) that would be great.

And seeing as God is outside of time, when You read this, you pray that tonight I dream about falling, clouds and monkeys with spoons for feet, anything but the nice normal conversation dreams that leave me feeling so meh.

(and if you read this, even though you said you don't, sorry if it creates any awkwardness)