Oh the (make believe) guilt

While using one of the trains in Berlin I saw a bag unattended, it was our stop and we left. As we were talking away I thought about the terrorist threat that was on the front page of the German news papers over the weekend, my mind wondered and I thought about how I (or someone else) would feel if I (they) later found out it had turned out to be a bomb. Obviously, this didn't happen, but my brain rambled and I wrote it down. I would be a terrible thing to know you could have done something but didn't. How would someone even start to get over that sort of guilt?
Its horrible to read (I mean, its poorly written), but its what came to my mind, and I'm trying to write my initial thoughts as I feel editing and re-editing loses something.


I took many men and many women
Uncles, aunties and many cousins
I've got the blood of them all
Hands stained with my sin
Silent lipped, words mute instead of talking.

But how was l to know that the breath of death would blow?
Think l would sacrifice innocents just to destroy my greatest foe?
Its not the man l am or the man l choose to be,
it like STOP. REWIND. PLAY every minute every day
l'm a cursed man, an abomination,
l pray to the God in heaven but still l'm not free

So please draw near l fear my words you will not take
l'm sincere l swear please don't mark me with my mistake
A victim of circumstance
A bloody mess of circumstance
not planned like the steps of some sort of satanic worship dance.

How the hell did l end up in this place?
l fell obviously at blistering speed so far from grace
I wish l could forget their names
I wish l could forget their faces
I wish people would stop leaving these poision filled cases.