interestingly enough

I did a search for the word 'hurt' on my blog, its weird which particular posts that word has been used in over the last year or so...

the funniest thing

I had a dream the other night, my dad was there and I was ignoring him.
Finally, he comes up to me and tries to give me something, (this is quite normal for him, if he doesn't know what to say he'll try and hand something over in the hope it will create something to talk about). I refused the item (I think it was a Groove Armada single, he actually said "demo" and I can remember thinking to myself "single, he says demo but he means single. Just like when mum talks about about her hard drive being her memory...) but he persists and I point out what he is trying to give me I never asked for. He is mistaking me for my brother. Again he tries to give it to me and I get angry. He is standing about 4ft away from me and I tell him to come closer, he doesn't, so I point at the floor in front of me and yell at him to move. (I think there is something in the fact I told him to move to me and I didn't go to him). I think I then grab him, pull him over and get right in his face, I yell at him as I fall apart that I never wanted 'things', all I ever wanted was him and he was a fool to never see that. At this point we both burst into tears, both in each others arms, both of us sobbing into the part where the shoulder meets the neck. This isn't just sobbing it's from the very pit of your stomach that you have no control over, the type that in that moment of absolute brokenness you feel somehow complete and the noises you make seem to somehow soothe your soul.
And then we're apart, he is a short distance away probably thinking what to do and I'm left with this slightly tired numb feeling asking myself "what next?"

weh!?

Just got this text:

"Howdy, I have this number cus *friend's name* left it on his old phone so I thought I'd put it to good use. I appologise for any offense I mite of caused u at *friend's name* leaving do awhile back. Especially when I told you to f off. It wasn't anything personal not that it excuses my behaviour."

How am I meant to respond to that!?

The guy has been hateful towards me for well over a year and now I get a text!? That's almost on par with my Dad getting someone else to write me letter to tell me that he cares!

Because I'm too lazy/busy to blog

From: Dave Garcia
To: Ann
Subject: RE: 40% discount on still wine at Threshers,Wine Rack & Local with the attached voucher.

Yeah, a lot better.
Christmas last year wasn't perfect, but we hadn't seen each other in a year so that made a huge difference. Then there was the wedding which we were all very proud of and having the relatives over really gave us (well, I think anyway) a sense of family that we never had before. Pete having a child emphasised we're growing up, we're thinking about the future with the knowledge that we have each other and how important that really is.

I am looking forward to christmas, I'm hoping we'll do things a bit different, using a pre-prepared turkey last year took out so much stress out of the day which meant we were able to enjoy it more. We'll still be at my mum's where there is nothing to do so I dunno how that will work out. By hey, I'm hopeful.

No real plans, I've booked alot of the important days of for christmas and new years so that's cool. I am working, but not much.

From: Dave
To: Ann
Subject: RE: 40% discount on still wine at Threshers,Wine Rack & Local with the attached voucher.

So are you getting on better with yours brothers then?

How are you feeling about Christmas looming round the corner?

Have you got any plans? Are you working?

I'm

so hungry it hurts my chest but its too late at night to make anyway.
*sulk*

How to block the funwall on facebook

I dunno if you're like me, but I got kinda sick of having nasty porn and stupid videos shoved in my face when I went on my friend's profiles and their friends had posted something.

So, I came up with a solution, which I'm hasten to add only works if you use firefox, but I assume pretty much all of you do.

Firstly, you will need to install the Ad Block Plus extension.

Then restart firefox.

You will now be given an option from which you will get your ad block subscription, I chose America but it's up to you.

On the top right of your browser you will now see a red icon labled 'ABP' left click on the arrow beside it.

Choose preferences from the drop down.

Click 'add filter.'

paste this:

*slide.com/widgets* (including the stars)

then click 'ok'

click 'add filter'

paste this

*slide.com/fsnapshot/* (again, including the stars)

then click 'ok'.

Ok, job done!

Refresh the page and all funwall items will have disappeared.

Incase you are wondering what the filters did, the first blocked the actual item, the second blocked the preview.

Any questions, just ask.

Dave

Emails after the weekend

From: Dave
Sent: 19 November 2007 11:04
To: Laura
Subject: RE:

I'm really happy, this past year has been the year that we have actually bonded as a family and as brothers. We're all really excited about Pete and his wife having a child in april. We talked for ages about that, the future, our dad and how it is so important that we support each other (fathering each other because ours doesn't) and Pete as he moves into the biggest challenge of his life. I can't help but sigh with contentment.

:)

---

From: Laura
Sent: 19 November 2007 10:59
To: Dave
Subject: RE:

WOAH, that’s some weekend.

And you’re right, drinking beer is a right of passage to becoming a man. ‘Wild at Heart’ would be proud. It shows your dangerous and wild side. Hehe, I am enjoying the book btw, even if I gest at it at times!

It does honestly sound like a great weekend though. I’m so glad you had such a good time with your brothers too J xxxx

---

From: Dave
Sent: 19 November 2007 10:57
To: Laura
Subject: RE:

On Friday I went to london and experienced dubstep for the first time, it's pretty much just raw bass and not much else, my face was vibrating! I went to bed at 5:30. am

On Saturday we met up in the pub and laughed, we laughed so hard I couldn't breathe. I was a really great evening, then at night my brothers and I went to see groove amarda (sp?) with VIP tickets! We then went to the after party. I went to bed at 4am

On Sunday we hung out in london, walked loads and got the train home. I passed out at 11pm and am still feelin' it.

Oh, and I drank beer! I never do that. Now I'm a proper man.

From: Laura
Sent: 19 November 2007 10:55
To: Dave
Subject:

Btw, are you a sleepy head today because you had a late night? xx